Every time something bad happens or doesn’t work out, are you tempted to quit?
Do you have thoughts like ‘oh well, I guess the universe doesn’t support this’ and then feel sorry for yourself?
If so, you need to watch this video!
What if misfortune and temporary defeat was just part of the process of change?
Tattoo the following quote on your face if you need to…(tee hee).
Napoleon Hill says…. “That is one of the tricks of opportunity. It has a sly habit of slipping in by the back door, and often it comes disguised in the form of misfortune, or temporary defeat. Perhaps this is why so many fail to recognize opportunity”.
Ok, so don’t be tricked, don’t give up and keep going!
Want daily inspirational videos like this one that will keep you focused on your outcome, despite things seemingly going awry?
Do you ever just feel like you don’t feel like doing anything, but don’t know what to do, what not to do and at the same time feel frustrated that you are neither accomplishing anything or even taking a break?
I totally get that.
Here is why it happens and what to do with it.
Find out why it is a gift!
Want ‘word medicine’ like this on a daily basis?
If you said ‘YES’! then you’ll want to join the Dream Design Tribe to stay focused on being who you need to be and doing what you need to do, to make your dreams come true!
I will tell you everything you need to know, so that you can walk away from the call knowing exactly what to do….this is a training call, not one of those calls where you listen to my story for 30min….learn the ‘why’ and no ‘how’.
Honey, it is time to re connect with who you really are and create your life from a place of unlimitedness!
Let me help you make the space and time to do it with this journal exercise.
Watch the video and then create sacred space to sit down and really dive deeply into these questions. Or if you are a coffee shop junky (like I am!), just sneak off and have a coffee date with your self!
Over a year ago I came across an article with a husband complaining about his wife being fat. Wish I could remember what article it was. Not only did the article disgust me, but so did the comments from sympathetic men complaining too about their own wives bodies.
I started writing this response and then thought I would save it for an article.
So here you go….this is me speaking up for all the wives out there who have gained weight and are married or with ‘dolts’ who just don’t get that – it’s their fault.
That’s right buddy.
The fact that you think that she’s lazy, undisciplined and that it is her own fault she’s fat, is proof through projection.
But let’s face it, a man that lacks depth to the point where he can’t see how he is fuelling his wife’s weight gain, isn’t likely deep enough in his understanding of himself to know that he gets not only what he gives – but what he expects.
It is time for you to expect more of your self than you do of your wife, Mr.
If you don’t treat your woman like a goddess, then stop expecting her to look anything more than frazzled frumpy and fat – as the natural sequella of how frustrating and stressful it is to live with you.
If you are the cause of your wife’s stress or if you can’t ‘man up’ and be ’cause’ in relieving your wife of stress, then you are a trigger for your wife’s ‘fatness’.
Just because you can lose weight by restricting calories and exercising, doesn’t mean she can. Not only are you a total dick, but also a dumb ass if all you can do is repeat ‘calories in, calories out’ as a sacred mantra for why you pressure her to exercise.
It just shows how uneducated you are on the topic of woman and weight loss.
Since you are obviously clueless, how about listening for a change?
Here is how you are making your wife fat via high cortisol:
1) You are stressing her out – which leads to insulin resistance and hormone imbalances that make it incredibly difficult to burn stored body fat (please conjure up enough the mental resiliency to research this if you want to have any relevant information or support to offer your wife).
2) You’re not PRESENT (you probably don’t even know what that really means or really looks like and that means she is not feeling fulfilled in her relationship with you).
3) Your snide comments make her feel even more alone. Feeling alone is stress. Your an ass for isolating her in more ways than one and you know it. And obviously it isn’t working. So why are you being so stupid as to do something over and over again that doesn’t help?
4) You are making it so that you can’t have what you want. When you complain about her body, she feels compelled to withdraw and withhold sex from you – obviously. If she told you that your penis was too short or too thin and unsatisfying, how much sex would you be in the mood for?
5) Your life is simple. Her’s is more complicated. And you are making it worse for her. You are not multi tasking. She is… She has her job, her business, the kids, housework, cooking meals, helping friends, serving clients, plus all the other invisible work she does that you simply don’t even see (while you need a pat on the back every time you take out the garbage, she simply sees something undone and does it without expecting a medal). She is the one losing sleep with worry about stuff undone, the health of loved ones, fear of the future of living into infinity with you.
6) She is overwhelmed and overburdened. Your immaturity, lack of direction, lack of focus and lack of purpose doesn’t help (and by the way, that makes you unattractive to her…..hmm….maybe that is why she doesn’t really feel compelled to deepen into her feminine to attract you). She’s drowning in stress hormones and tired of being the one to take control and get stuff done.
7) She is more of a man than you are. She’s been the one ‘manning up’ and assuming a size to match the degree to which she has to be in her masculine (because you are not embodying yours enough to give her the security to be feminine).
8) You feel less attracted to her natural physical form because you are a porn addict. You would appreciate her body at any size if HER pussy was the only one you had the pleasure of looking at or connecting with. But instead you choose to make her less significant sexually as you choose instead to ‘get off’ on other pussies through porn or cheating.
9) You want a quick fix. Instead of having to go through the effort of courting and building up her sexual desire – instead you jerk off (now look who’s lazy)? You are wasting your ‘drive’ through masturbation. How about using your ‘sex energy’ to motivate you to create the life of your dreams (now that would actually be attractive to her than being with a weak man who whines about her weight).
10) You are not cultivating her desire. She’s cooling down and the fat keeps her warm in the absence of your passion.
11) She puts out (or she used to, but let’s face it, you never delivered). If it sounds like just too much effort, then maybe you can understand why you are with a women for whom striving for a hot body is also too much effort. If she’s lazy, it ‘s because you started it.
12) You are always satisfied sexually she never is. You ‘come’ too fast and she never gets to experience her full sexual potential as a woman – regardless of how hot she is or could be….so she thinks why bother being attractive to having to suffer through this man’s annoying and unfulfilling sexual advances.
13) Even when she lived up to your standards physically, you still turned to porn and you weren’t romantic. She feels unappreciated and replaceable at any size, so why bother?
14) You have the maturity and emotional intelligence of a horny teenager. You want the privilege of being with a woman with a hot body, but you want nothing to do with having the responsibility of taking care of your ‘toy’.
15) You are not deep. You are shallow. She is emotionally unfulfilled by your connection.
16) You are not dependable. You look to her for direction. She is tired of being your mother.
17) She doesn’t trust you to protect her or be there for her. That’s stressful and raising her cortisol so that she can’t burn fat, not to mention it is given her wrinkles and grey hair (yeah that’s your fault too).
18) You are weak. You hide in your man cave and you can’t weather the emotionality of women (any woman of any size for that matter). And now her fat is a protection and it insulates her – because you don’t.
19) Now that you’ve made your passion for her conditional, she can’t lose the weight and keep her autonomy at the same time. If she attains the body you want her to have, she’ll resent your attraction. In fact, she’s thinking that if she had that body, she would want to find someone else to share it with. Someone whose passion is deeper and more authentic than yours is.
20) You don’t actually don’t know how to help, you helpless bastard you. Your wife has insulin resistance and hormone imbalance caused by the stress of all of the above – and because of that, restricting calories and more exercise are not going to result in weight loss. So stop badgering on about that and actually do your research in the physiology of weight loss for women – especially if you think your so damn smart – act like it.
21) You made her body want to be fat. You’ve both mistakenly bought into the low calorie, low fat diet and over exercise mentality….all of which causes her body to hold on to fat – no matter what she does or doesn’t do, her body wants to be fat – and for her, trying once more feels futile. And why bother, she doesn’t have much to look forward to – after all, she is with you.
22) Your ignorance and judgement don’t help. You are one of her biggest obstacles to losing weight.
Take a look in the mirror.
She overlooked your imperfections, in fact, the fact that she hasn’t left you because of your fat shaming is one of your imperfections that she is overlooking – but really she shouldn’t…..she should have left a long time ago.
It’s you who needs to work on himself.
So how about taking responsibility for what you see, be a man and try meeting her needs – instead of trying to get her to do it ‘your way’ – or just standing there pointing your finger and co creating the situation you are trying to avoid.
If all those 22 things sound like too much work to change within yourself, then leave her and let her be free to be truly loved.
Believe me, there are many men out there who would be thrilled to be with her. They think she is beautiful inside and out – and hot as hell – so get out of the way little man and let a big man step in.
And as for you, find a woman as shallow as you are…..someone who is satisfied with your extreme lack of depth as a man.
Hopefully, one that expects you to go to the gym and keep up the body of a Greek god.
It just amazes me how so many men with mediocre bodies, want their wives to look like super models, but have such low expectations of how they look themselves.
Do you think your wife thinks you are as hot as the guys she sees in magazines and action films. Not even close. Do you think she finds those guys hot? Um yeah. But how shallow and rude would it be for her to expect that from you?
But buddy could you at least do the bare minimum?
Take a shower (your hair is greasy), brush your damn teeth (your breath fucking stinks!) and could you for once get some style?
If you are still reading this (or not already commenting trying to justify why it is not your fault and why I am a bitch for saying so)……you just might be a good guy after all.
So if you are actually here to learn, because you really care about your wife and saving your marriage (because yes, she would be right in being ready to leave a fat shaming prick like you), here are 13 things you need to start doing right away:
1) Decide now that you will NEVER say one more thing about her weight EVER.
2) You need to learn how to be present. If you want to learn that from a man, you need to learn from Anthony Robbins or David Deida.
3) You need purpose. She can’t get behind you if you don’t have that and she’ll be stressed that she can’t depend on you at the soul level.
4) You need to be a better provider. How is her cortisol going to go down if she doesn’t know how the bills are going to get paid or can’t put healthy meals on the table?
5) If you want her to wear attractive clothes, then you need to stop complaining about how much money she spends (or you need to be resourceful and make more).
6) Treat her like a goddess and she’ll become one (dates, flowers, gifts etc.).
7) Stop being such a bore. Women love variety. Think surprises, adventure, and travel.
8) Don’t make lack of money your excuse. That is sooooooo unresourceful. A scaredy cat, unresourceful man who is full of excuses, is NOT by any means attractive.
9) Be interesting. Women love to talk and be intellectually stimulated. Get a life so that you can tell her about it.
10) Take some weight off your wife metaphorically speaking – if you want to help her relax enough to let the weight go and access her sexual desire.
11) Study tantra and actually fulfill her sexually.
12) Quit it with the porn. And use that energy to add more value to her life. She loves being turned on as much as you do. Turn that energy towards her (but not in a gross disgusting man-boy way – sorry to be the bearer of bad news.. but it makes a womea want to vomit when a man waves his dick at her!). Instead cultivate growing desire in her in a romantic sexy way (and if you have no idea what I mean, that’s another reason it’s your fault your wife is fat).
13) How about your level of attractiveness? Do you place as high expectations on yourself as you do on her? Believe me, she is kinder than you are. She could easily come up with ways that you could be more attractive (inside and out). But unlike you, she is kinder than that. And smarter than you – she knows that shaming, attacking or placing pressure on you to look a certain way, will just evoke more insecurity and counter will in you – and will not be effective.
But secretly, there is a good chance that she feels that you lack some or all of everything I just wrote about and she doesn’t find you that attractive either (she won’t even retaliate by saying so – because she would never stoop as low as you do).
So please get that your personality is as at least as repulsive to her, as you are repulsed by her fat.
Now put your damn tail between your legs do the 13 aforementioned things if you really care.
But do them without attachment. And give her the gift of reading this article as a way of saying “I’m sorry, I get it now”.
But if you are going to stay being a jack ass of a husband and don’t have the balls to follow through on being an amazing partner, just leave her so that she can be free to be appreciated, loved and treated like the goddess she is by a guy who would never need to read this.
If you want to lose weight permanently, you gotta accept that it happens pretty much directly in the opposite direction of speed compared to a fad diet.
If you lose quickly, you are also quick to gain.
If you lose slowly, you will be slow to gain.
There are no quick fixes, so don’t buy into another one come January!
If you want to lose weight, you might be thinking of going on a diet in January (please don’t)!
None of them are sustainable – and all of them only work if you stay on them forever (and worse, some make you gain more weight than when you started!).
Truly sustainable and permanent weight loss (that’s what you want right?), happens much differently than losing weight quickly and then gaining it all back (and then some!).
That is what you’ve probably come to expect with dieting.
Why do the same thing and expect different results?
That is plain old silly.
We all know that a lifestyle change is necessary for permanent weight loss.
The trouble is, you’ve been sold a lie about what kind of lifestyle is required to keep you thin.
If you think that the 3 following ‘things’ are necessary to lose weight, then you need to get on this training so that I can set the record straight for you: http://www.nutritionwisdom.ca/sweet-life-wo-sugar/
1. restricting calories (no!)
2. cutting fat (nope!)
3. exercise (nadda!)
Honey, none of that is going to work (the only kind of people it works for are healthy young people without damaged metabolisms – and even they can’t maintain it for long).
If you’ve been overweight your whole life, you’ve had a baby or you are pushing 40….you already know, these strategies don’t work.
Without counting anything, without exercise and eating more fat than you will believe is healthy (in fact you would be shocked if you followed me around for a day (and no, I am not on a ketogenic diet).
Sign up for FREE if you want to learn how to eat more decadently than ever and lose the weight – PERMANENTLY!
I will tell you everything you need to know, so that you can walk away from the call knowing exactly what to do….this is a training call, not one of those calls where you listen to my story for 30min….learn the ‘why’ and no ‘how’.
When you are insulin resistant, sugar is sugar – it doesn’t matter if you are eating white table sugar off the spoon, a potato or a bag of chips.
Those starches are making you fat, frumpy and frustrated because insulin is pulling the rug out from under your hormones!
You see, once you have digested a carb, even if it is healthy, it turns into sugar in your body – even if you are a whole foodie, traditional foodie, raw foodist, vegetarian or a health nut by any other name – you are not immune.
You might be wondering….
But how could I be insulin resistant when I am not a diabetic?
Easy as 1, 2, 3 baby!…..
Eating too much sugar (even if you don’t eat any)
Lack of exercise
Stress (having babies, trauma, marriage difficulties, divorce, accidents, overexercising etc.)
Lacking love, connection and community in your life – deep sadness.
Unfulfilled expectations, feeling despondent about the future, feeling trapped in a job, marriage etc.
Eating too much natural sugar (coconut sugar, maple syrup, rhapadura, panella, honey).?
Fruit – a- holic anyone?
Not eating enough fat and protein – keeping yourself ‘full’ with pasta, bread, potatoes and yams.
Having parents with diabetes
Having a family background that is African American, Alaska Native, American Indian, Asian American, Hispanic/Latino, or Pacific Islander American
People who have diabetes weren’t perfectly healthy one day and then the next day have full blown diabetes – they make a slow decline towards it, starting with hypoglycemia.
It happened to me. A whole foodie health nut with 13 years behind me of being a vegetarian. It was all and well, until I started pushing 40. Here’s my story.
Not sure if you have hypoglycaemia? Do these apply?
start to feel shaky when you can’t get to your next meal?
feel ‘hangry’ – in other words you feel impatient, angry and snap at innocent bystanders, while you hunt for something you can eat now?
feel like you are always hungry and have to eat constantly to keep your blood sugar stable?
feel like a meal isn’t done unless it comes with bread or other starches?
feel the need to top your meals off with something sweet before you feel satisfed?
got a tummy (or mommy) roll just above your jeans (no matter what your weight, it just won’t go away)!?
If you have a tendency toward hormone problems and hypoglycemia, then you are going to love this FREE training call I have in store for you!
It is highly likely that insulin is throwing off your hormones and causing you to gain weight.
What can a girl do?!
You have to heal your insulin resistance, honey – so that you can enjoy eating sweet, creamy and rich foods again – without packing on the pounds.
So how can you know for sure, that insulin resistance is YOUR issue when it comes to your weight concerns?
Some more of the signs and symptoms of insulin resistance…..
Hypoglycaemia
Fatty liver
Having been diagnosed with gestational diabetes
Abdominal obesity
Cravings for sugar or carbohydrate rich foods.
Elevated blood sugar
Acne and large pores on the face
Polycystic ovarian syndrome
Scalp hair loss in women in the male pattern.
Skin tags
Swollen ankles
Ready to learn how to balance your blood sugar to balance your hormones and finally release the weight?
If you said YES! Click here to get access to ‘The Sweet Life with out Sugar’ training.
Best of all I am going to show you how to do it without giving up the sweet, rich and creamy foods you love!
Q. Hello Sherry! My question is: If divinity is my most important goal, because in my view it will shape all else considered “success” in this life, then how do I craft an intention that says I want to thrive mentally, emotion ally, physically & financially, while perfecting my divinity? How do I envision that goal? I really don’t know where to begin bcuz the universe really has a good sense of humor, lol! Pls help.
A. From my perspective, divinity is always present flowing through you…..meaning you have the power to create from that power at all times – you were born with it.
It is nothing to attain or intend, you already ARE that.
It is up to you to consciously direct your inherent power.
Because you have ‘free will’ as a unique expression of that divinity, it is not up to God/ess to decide how your life is to be shaped.
You get to play with the creative force in your own unique expression of it! That is the game of life. Your life is a ‘choose your own adventure story’!
You must gain a clear picture of your life as you would like it to be.
Journal out (or point form) exactly how you want to feel and look like mentally, emotion ally, physically & financially.
Be as specific as possible ….and then write …..”or something better and so it is!”
Next you must claim all these things as yours and tangibly decide and commit.
You do that by saying no or goodbye to what you already have created that you don’t like.
It means you burn a bridge or close a door.
Then you commit by creating something new or do something different than you have before (with consistency).
We must continue to take action in alignment toward the ideals we have imagined.
You let go of the outcome on the feeling level, yet still take aligned action in the physical world…..by acting on your hunches, opportunities etc. that come your way.
Divinity opens doors for you, but you walk through them!
Last week during the new moon, I got deeper clarity about what I am really here to do. It may sound strange, but the truth is, I don’t want to work with sick people.
This probably doesn’t sound right considering everything I put out there is to help people heal naturally.
But the truth is the first step to healing is not identifying with being sick and the second step is taking your health into your own hands.
In this video, I share why I think that based on my truth about what it takes to heal, and based on my personal experience, I am not here to help people who identify with being sick.
Watch it to find out what it really takes to heal yourself.
If my approach resonates and you feel like you need guidance and support to take your health into your own hands, let’s get together and map out a plan!
Or are you interested in joining us the Delish Diet group and want to know more about how I recently lost 37lbs?
I have such fond memories as a young child of my grandma.
She was such a beauty.
She had long black hair with one thick band of contrasting grey and soft blue mysterious eyes.
All day she wore her hair in a bun.
At night she would let down that gorgeous mane and I would beg her to let me brush it.
I was obsessed with long hair.
And then one day it happened.
Her daughters convinced her that she was too old for long hair.
And so she had it cut, dyed and permed into what I thought was a hideous and homogenous ‘old lady hairdo’.
You know the one.
I was appalled.
From that day forward, I decided, I would never be one of those old ladies.
I would keep my hair long.
I would also grey naturally and I prayed that I would be blessed with the same gorgeous thick grey ‘skunk stripe’ that my grandma had.
I just can’t stand seeing women succumb to the idea that long hair is just for young ladies.
Or that growing old means that fat and frumpiness are inevitable.
Good god, that is ridiculous.
What I see is that many women who were once radiantly feminine, when they get to a certain age, they stop adorning themselves in the feminine ways they once enjoyed.
It shows from what they choose to wear, how they style their hair, to letting their body change from curvy to square.
Aging this way has become not only accepted, but expected.
Frankly, it saddens me that women just accept it.
And worse, it maddens me, that as a woman ages, she is expected by society to cut her hair, buy old lady clothes and drench her scalp in chemicals?
Agh!
I am not going to do any of that….and I am not going to succumb to the chub either.
Just because it is common for women (and men) to start packing on pounds after 40, that doesn’t mean it is natural or the healthy sequela of aging.
Some people justify that gaining weight is a natural healthy part of aging, because that extra belly fat can help the adrenals take over for the ovaries to produce estrogen when the ovaries stop producing it (menopause).
Although fat cells do produce and store estrone, some consider too much estrogen generated in this way, to be the unhealthy form related to estrogen dominant cancers.
During menopause, our adrenals produce adrenaandrostenedione, which is converted into estrone by an enzyme called aromatase, found mainly in adipose tissue.
Estrone is then converted into estradiol, the most potent healthy form of estrogen.
To do so, we need to have optimal adrenal gland function, but due to the chronic stress of the modern life, many women’s adrenals are taxed (this is one of the reasons that menopause is often such a challenge for modern women).
Overtaxed adrenals fail to keep up with the demand for sex hormone precursors (inhibited by cortisol – the stress hormone).
So the tummy roll develops to compensate, but beware that the tummy roll is also a symptom of insulin resistance.
Far too many women experience chronic stress, so it stands to reason that while this compensatory mechanism is a common occurrence (one that makes for a rough ride into menopause!), it doesn’t mean that it is optimal or necessary.
If the tummy roll was a sign of good health, would that mean that women who keep their curves and don’t have one are unhealthy?
That doesn’t make sense.
Look around you.
Have you noticed that as people age and become overweight, their body shape often becomes more and more androgynous?
Men can have estrogen dominance too – it feminizes them.
That’s where the ‘beer belly’ and the ‘man boobs’ come from.
I became aware of this long before it started happening to me.
I distinctly remember having this moment when I realized I was at a crossroads.
I’ve mostly been curvy all my life. But around the age of 37, I started packing on the pounds in what felt like literally overnight.
At first I didn’t really notice because I was bigger everywhere – and honestly, I enjoyed having the big boobies, tee hee!
But when suddenly I noticed my waist disappearing and that arm and back fat was appearing, I couldn’t ignore it any longer.
I could have simply accepted the weight gain and begin to enter into my crone years taking on the typical grandma look.
The truth is, part of me thought it wouldn’t be that half bad, after all pudgy grannies are the cutest ever!
Who doesn’t love the image of a little white haired granny with reading glasses half way down her nose, sitting on a rocking chair in front of a fire knitting?!!
Or I could chose to look like this grandma Annette Larkins (raw foodist 74 yrs), or this one Mimi Kirk (raw food cookbook author 75 yrs) or this one Ernestine Shepherd ( body builder 77 yrs), this one Daphne Selfe (model at 88 yrs), this one Greta Pontarelli (pole dancer 66 yrs), this one Tao Porchon-Lynch (yogini 98 years) or Josefina Monasterio (71 year old body builder)
What do you prefer: the curves created by balanced hormones or the bulges created by hormonal havoc?
Personally, if curves are on the menu, that’s what I’m having!
But that doesn’t happen by accident. You can’t just do what everyone around you is doing and expect to get different results than they have.
In this day and age there is a lot working against those of us who want to blossom into hot grannies!
The truth is, when you lose your curves and gain weight around the waist, that is a symptom of estrogen dominance and insulin resistance.
Even if you are fine with the extra weight, you must know that beyond appearance, estrogen dominance is a serious health issue that should not be ignored.
So if you want to let go of the ‘bulges’ and get your curves back, you are going to want to listen in to my upcoming call to learn how to balance your hormones so that you can go from feeling fat, frumpy, frustrated, puffy and drying out – to feeling slim, sexy and satisfied again!
It is never too late!
I am going to show you how easy it is and best of all, you don’t have to exercise, count calories or give up the rich, creamy sweet foods you love : )
Click here to get access to the ‘Live Sweet w/o Sugar’ training!
She had long black hair with one thick band of contrasting grey and soft blue mysterious eyes.
Have you noticed that as people age and become overweight, their body shape often becomes more and more androgynous?